EFFECTIVE PARENTING BY MRS JOSEPHINE OLALEYE (Family Seervice)
Family Service
Minister: Deaconess Josephine Olaleye
Rccg Strongtower Parish
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Some
studies have categorized children into 3 basic categories:
EVERY CHILD IS UNIQUE
MEET THEM...
¨A . The Compliant ones. They are easy going, cry less as babies, quiet adaptability to new situation, obey instructions more easily as children and teens. Summarily, they can be described as the COMPLIANT children.
Minister: Deaconess Josephine Olaleye
Rccg Strongtower Parish
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FOCUS
¨2.
Different Parenting styles
¨3.
Parenting for the Christian family in this age.
Though all children seem to be born helpless, vulnerable
and
dependent, they all come with diverse temperaments, genetic make up and
abilities.
Psalms 139:13-16, Genesis 25:23-28
EVERY CHILD IS UNIQUE
¨1.
The Easy going or Compliant Child
¨2.
The Strong Willed Child
¨3.
The Shy or Slow to warm up Child.
MEET THEM...
¨A . The Compliant ones. They are easy going, cry less as babies, quiet adaptability to new situation, obey instructions more easily as children and teens. Summarily, they can be described as the COMPLIANT children.
¨B.
The Strong willed ones.
They have intense mood swings, cry more as babies, more negative reaction to
people, violent tantrums when unhappy, "test" their parents'
authority more and can be daring. They may bully others and do not enjoy
obeying instructions. They can be described as DIFFICULT .
¨C.
The Slow to warm/Shy ones.
They may initially respond negatively to
people or new but they eventually adapt
well. As babies, they tend to have regular sleeping and feeding habits, when
upset or frustrated, they withdraw and react mildly rather than explode like
the strong willed child.
•
Depending on parental influence, environment, prayers and other factors,
children may grow up with these inborn nature or change for better/worse.
Thus,
the necessity for INTENTIONAL
PARENTING.
Proverbs 18:22
¨1. The
Uninvolved/Neglectful Style. These parents leave
the upbringing , training, corrections of their children for other people
(media, teachers, relatives, church etc) to take care of. They rarely
deliberately communicate with their children. They may provide the daily needs
of the children.
2. The Indulgent/Permissive Style.
Permissive parents, sometimes referred to as indulgent parents, have very few
demands to make of their children.
These parents rarely discipline their
children because they have relatively low expectations of maturity and
self-control. They infantile their children even for age appropriate
responsibilities.
They almost never say "no" to their
children.
In this style of parenting, children are
expected to follow the strict rules established by the parents. Failure to
follow such rules usually results in punishment. Authoritarian parents don't
explain the reasoning behind these rules. If asked to explain, the parent might
simply reply, "Because I said so." These parents have high demands
but are not responsive to their children. According to Baumrind,
these parents "are obedience- and status-oriented, and expect their orders
to be obeyed without explanation."
¨4. The
Authoritative Style.
Authoritative parents also have rules that children are expected to follow,
however, they allow some exceptions to the rules. They often tell children the
reasons for the rules and they are more willing to consider a child’s feelings
when setting limits. Children raised with authoritative discipline tend to be
happy, assertive successful. They are skilled in evaluating safety risks on
their own. They often grow up to be responsible adults who feel comfortable
expressing their opinions
PARENTING FOR CHRISTIAN PARENTS IN THIS AGE
¨1.
Understand that children are gifts from God irrespective of their temperaments
or genetic make up.
¨2.
Times are changing faster than we can imagine. Values are being lost by the
day.
¨3.
Godly values and other universal principles must be deliberately built into our
children. Consistent and in depth teaching of the word of God on the personality of God, prayers, sobriety,
decency, modesty, respect, hardwork etc
¨4.
Disciplines must be established from early stage not just for controlling
children but to prepare them to becoming Godly and responsible adults.
5. Seek to keep positive communication
line open in all the stages of parenting.
6. Keep praying for your children
irrespective of their ages or whatever they are going through
ARE YOU A PARENT?
A- ACCEPT their basic personality and
seek ACCESS to best to influence them.
R- REVIEW your role, impact and RELEVANCE
of existing rules
E- EDUCATE them on everything relating to
life and EXERT your authority early and for as long as possible.
N- NEGOTIATE when and where necessary.
T- TRACK what they do, know, belief and
engage in.
HINDRANCE TO EFFECTIVE PARENTING
1. Failing in the duties of nurturing and
indoctrination . Because of pastors' ever busy schedules, we sometimes are
guilty of leaving the upbringing of our children to others.
2. Parents/Pastors not being true to what
they profess.
3. Double standard living .
4. Faulty style of parenting.
Authoritarian or indulgent rather than authoritative.
5. Other unseen factors.
CONCLUSION
Psalms 144:12, Phil 2:15
Parenting children that will honour God
is a necessity for all Christian
homes.
God is counting on us to raise a generation that will stand and counter the current decadence in the world
system.
EFFECTIVE PARENTING BY MRS JOSEPHINE OLALEYE (Family Seervice)
Reviewed by RCCG Strongtower
on
Sunday, October 16, 2016
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